Be patient... A familiar refrain. With summer work in full swing, users of the TER Metz-Thionville-Luxembourg line are currently only able to get as far as Bettembourg, the station from which replacement coaches are waiting. These are accessible by elbowing, shouting and trampling anyone who gets in your way.

This arduous journey will continue until 15 September and will, of course, have an effect on your mood. Spoiler alert: you’ll be fairly angry, most of the time. Here’s the struggle that French cross-border commuters go through every day, in 26 phrases, from A-Z.

Acclimatisation (acclimatisation)

Wearing your triple-layer down jacket in the wintertime, you slowly roast and sweat profusely from your armpits. In the summer, you shiver in the air-conditioning--covid symptoms guaranteed. On board the TER, you learn to live between two extremes, as if in a draughty sauna. At least, when it comes to climate disruption, the train is ahead of its time.

Bettembourg

This is no longer the symbol that you’ve crossed the Rubicon River. In July-August-September, everyone gets off at this station, which rhymes with: “Well, I’m going to be late again this morning!”

Coach de substitution (substitution bus)

A mode of transport that proves that travelling in a seated position is not an unreasonable ambition in one’s existence.

Decibels (decibels)

Regularly inflicted on the entire carriage thanks to poorly made headphones or earphones. Or by passengers over-confident in the foresight of their Spotify selection. To those of you choosing to listen to Jul or Mariah Carey at 7am: seriously?

Été (summer)

Summer is an excellent season for construction. And, for the second year running, it’s the perfect time to rip out rails, cables, concrete platforms... and passengers’ nerves.

Frontaliers (cross-border birds… err… commuters)

The “frontalier” is a migratory species that can be seen every morning between 6am and 9am, and once again, every evening from 4pm. In between, the aforementioned species takes advantage of its work break to regain its strength at the office. A well-deserved respite.

Gare (station)

It’s easier to cross a platform than to walk from one end of a carriage to the other. So the staff on board have adapted: since the trains are too crowded to move with authority in the aisles, tickets are checked when you get off at the arrival station. It’s the only place you can finally walk. And breathe. And get caught.

Horaires (schedules)

Something that can only be estimated, according to the CFL and the SNCF. Not to be confused with “promise” and “contractual commitment.”

Interactions sociales (social interactions)

Nonexistent. No one to speak with, no one to offer even a silent “hello” from the other side of the armrest. Except when the carriage overflows and you find yourself sharing a corner with the armpit of your unfortunate neighbour. How many whirlwind romances are born on the basis of such spontaneous intimacy?

Jambes (legs)

A pair of limbs often tucked underneath oneself due to a lack of adequate space to stretch them out. A godsend for physiotherapists and osteopaths in the Greater Region. Thanks to whom?

Klaxon (horn)

A lucky man was savouring the smoothness of the journey, the comfortable train, the presence of a pleasant, friendly and freshly showered seatmate, a little silence perhaps, the comfort of a sizzling sunbeam behind the window... He was just beginning to believe that this morning would proceed without issues, without delays, without stress. Then... another TER. Speeding in the opposite direction, releasing a blast of the horn to warn oncoming traffic. A startled awakening. A sharp return to reality for the drowsy passenger, who was far away in his dreams.

Libération (freedom)

The feeling that every cross-border worker experiences when they are entitled to telework. Waking up with no TER timetable breathing down your neck, no sprinting to find the best place on the platform. In short, it’s the only day of the week when the model employee turns up for work without already being at the end of his tether. On the employer’s side, there are still those who believe that two hours of commuting per day is good training--and that employee motivation is measured by the amount of wear and tear on their season ticket…

Millimètre carré (square millimetre)

A unit of measurement designed to assess the space granted to each passenger at rush hour. Spoiler: zero.

Nœud ferroviaire (rail junction)

Technical jargon for the tangle of railway tracks along a route. Another reading: a noose coldly tightening its brown embrace around passengers’ necks.

Ouverture des portes (doors opening)

An event celebrated with fervour and feverishness at the Thionville train station. Where, morning after morning, the rules of the game are based on a well-known formula: first in, first… squashed.

Ponctualité (punctuality)

Like a unicorn, we imagine, dream and fantasise about it; yet never, ever, has anyone witnessed it.

Quatre, comme 4G (four, like 4G)

Between Hettange-Grande and Bettembourg, 4G plays hide and seek; 5G remains a concept, a legend, a pipe dream. Teams meetings and urgent emails are a thing of the past. Yes, cross-border commuters swear to their employers, hand on heart, that they use their commuting time to work on the train. This is indeed the case. But if they do work, it is first and foremost at their tolerance threshold.

RGPD (GDPR)

General Data Protection Regulation. In the TER, we don’t give a damn: I’ll read my confidential messages in your full view; I’ll share my classified Excel spreadsheets with you on my laptop screen as if they were colouring pages... Not to mention the discussions on the café terraces where, every other time, the attentive ear quickly guesses the company being discussed between these two colleagues exchanging the latest coffee machine gossip as if they were the last beings on Earth... In short, on the outward journey as on the return journey, everyone sits on the GDPR. Well: those lucky ones with a seat.

Sac à dos (backpack)

An object weighing several kilos, carried on the shoulders. The cross-border commuter spends so little time at his (physical) home that he probably finds it comforting--like a snail--to take his home with him.

TER

Regional Express Transport. Feel free to remove the (ir)relevant adjective…

Uniforme (uniform)

Loose-fitting clothing, comfortable sneakers, water bottle slung over your shoulder... More than a uniform, it’s combat gear for the seasoned cross-border commuter. You don’t take the TER; you endure it.

Valises (bags)

The kind you carry around (under your eyes) in the early hours of the morning, and not the ones you carry around in your hand. In any case, there would be no room on board for the latter.

Wagon (carriage)

On every journey, the same delectable suspense: how many carriages? Four carriages? Seven carriages? How many more? Short trains, long trains? On the platform, you wait for the train’s snout to appear like a Euromillons player waiting for the winning numbers to be drawn. As we all know, size isn’t everything. But in this case, it does, a little, all the same.

X, comme facteur X (X, like the factor X)

That is, this seasonal surge in traffic on the tracks. The reason: those dear interns! Swelling the ranks of already professionally integrated cross-border commuters. Interns can be spotted from the second day onwards by their brand new Big Four backpacks and their anxious glances in the direction of the electronic sign indicating the next stop station. They’re not yet jaded and no doubt full of goodwill. But they’re already standing with their noses crushed against a door.

Yoga (yoga)

A discipline recommended to survive the daily repetition of journeys. The heron posture is practiced perched on one leg between two seats, breath controlled so as not to grumble too loudly, flexibility of mind to absorb the umpteenth time the train has stopped in the middle of the track, “please don’t try to get off, our train is likely to set off again at any moment…” By the way, is the heron a conciliatory character?

Zut (drat)

We don’t want to depress anyone, but in case you missed it, in terms of work on the route, it will be the same litany in July-August 2026, then in July-August 2027. And this time there will be more than a month’s interruption to traffic from Thionville station onwards. On that note, happy summer!

This article was originally published in French.